So here we are again. Retrieval is tomorrow. All of the normal characters have arrived. The bloating was late, but my belly is now the approximate size and consistency of a bowling ball. I thought that the nipples of fire might give this cycle a pass, but no, here they are. And more annoyingly yet that vicious tease hope has entered the building. She's laying low, because she knows that if she says too much, I'm likely to bust open a can of whoop-ass, but she's still sitting there, smiling at me, and occasionally whispering in my ear. She's annoying.
I can't say that I'm excited about the retrieval. Last time it wasn't awful, but it DID hurt. Somehow I don't think that seeing the eggs (if there are any) will be as exciting as last time. I certainly don't think it'll make up for the pain again. I guess we'll see, though. I keep trying to remind myself that this is a different cycle, and that it may have a different outcome. Still, since I haven't actually let myself think about the possibility of a positive outcome, my imagination is sort of in a bind here. I can't let myself hope, but without hope, this process really is without redeeming features. What's a girl to do?